


Stupid Boggarts

by Sage_Speight_Trickster_In_Training



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Boggarts, Happy ending though, Minor panic attack, Professor Lupin - Freeform, Werewolves, depressed character, dont read it triggered, mention of cutting, mention of self harm, very negative insults towards themselves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 08:33:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10158863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sage_Speight_Trickster_In_Training/pseuds/Sage_Speight_Trickster_In_Training
Summary: The reader is a werewolf and friend of Remus. Remus is like his father figure/big brother. The reader;s parents died when he was young from the flu.  He is Remu's tudent and they are doing boggarts. Remus and ther reader tell eachother everything. Well, almost everything.....warning, this might be triggering for some peopel, if it is, please dont read it unless you'll be safe to do so





	

Everyone is looking around and waiting for the new DADA professor Remus Lupin to arrive and (y/n) smiles. He knows Remus has always had a record with tardiness. (Y/n) knows about him being a marauder, after all. Remus had been (y/n)’s friend ever since he had been born. He was also there for (y/n) when (y/n) was bitten by a wild werewolf a couple years ago and when he was put in Slytherin. 

(Y/n) had asked the sorting hat for Slytherin when it was stuck between Slytherin and Gryffindor, not because he wanted to cause trouble, like most Slytherins. But because (y/n) wanted to be the one to break stereotypes at Hogwarts. And Remus had fully supported (y/n) in his decision.

Suddenly the doors burst open and everyone turns to watch as the light haired man stumbled into the classroom. He looks up at his students and smiles sheepishly in apology and rushes to the front of the classroom. (Y/n) gives him a smile and thumbs up as Remus passes him.

“Okay class,” Remus’ voice is a little breathless as he dumps a few books on his desk and turns to look at his students,” Today we are going to be going a training exercise against boggarts. Can anyone tell me what a boggart is?” 

Immediately, (y/n) and most of the ravenclaws’ hands shot up, ready to answer the professor’s question.  Remus chuckles at the quick hand raising and searches the crowd until his gaze rests on (y/n).

“(Y/n), would you please tell the class what a boggart is, for those who may not know?” His voice is closer to normal now that he’s stopped rushing and gives (y/n) a small smile of encouragement. He knows how (y/n) rarely speaks up in classes and mostly stays quiet and observant.

“No problem teach,” Remus rolls his eyes at the nickname, but motions for (y/n) to continue, nonetheless. “ A boggart is a shape shifter that usually lurks in dark spaces or anywhere dark. It has no definite form, taking the shape of that which is most feared by the person who encounters it. When someone isn't looking at it, it is said to look like black smoke. Also, for the more powerful boggart, once it has taken the form of a person's fear, it can only he defeated by the person it is scaring. It would take a lot to get it to pick a new target once it has one in site .”  (Y/n)’s voice is quiet in the small room, but just loud enough for Remus to hear him on the other side of the room.

“Yes! Very good Mr.(y/n). 15 points to Slytherin. Now, if you are to encounter a boggart, the spell you must cast is ‘Ridiculous’. Can everyone repeat that together. Without wands for the moment please.” 

“Ridiculous.” The whole class chanted together and Remus smiled happily.

“Good, good. Now, the spell won’t be what gets the boggart. It’s the start, but what really finishes a boggart is laughter. When you cast the spell, you must think of a way to change it to make it funny.” Remus smiled excitedly and crosses to the middle of the room where a tall closet is and turns around to face his students again. “Now, I want you all to get in a line so we can practice. Neatly please!” As soon as Remus said ‘line’ everyone started to push others around. Some trying to get to the front of the line, and some trying to get to the back. 

“Don’t push- wait- don’t, oh well. I guess that will work.” Remus’ voice was lost in the small crowd, but (y/n) heard him perfectly with his werewolf hearing. (Y/n) stepped to the side, slightly away from the crowd and waits for it to get more organized. As he watches his classmates shove each other, he looks at Remus and smirks. He had told Remus teaching was going to be more difficult than he anticipated. 

Once everyone was in a line, (y/n) snuck  behind the first 5 or so students. (Y/n) already knew the spell so he tuned Remus out and began to think what his boggart would be. Remus had told him that his was a moon, because he was afraid of wolfing out and hurting someone. Bue (y/n) wasn’t scared of that. He never had a reason to be scared of hurting anyone. Remus had always kept him away from people on the full moons. 

As (y/n) watches, the first 4 people in front of him have relatively normal boggarts. A clown, a thunder cloud, some muggle horror movie monster and a bear so far. So far everyone has successfully dealt with their boggarts. 

But as the girl infront of (y/n) goes, her boggart turns into two people who look like parents. They start shouting at her about her being worthless and how she couldn’t do anything right. As (y/n) watches, she starts shaking and crying. Remus starts to step forward to intervene, but the girl shouts ‘ridiculous’ and they turn into two clowns spraying each other with water flowers. Some people laugh, but the girl just shakily walks past (y/n) and to the back of the room.

The room is quieter than before as (y/n) steps forward. As the clowns turn into a swirling smoke, a sign that it is searching for a form to take, (y/n) feels his stomach clench in thought of what his boggart might be. The only thing in (y/n) life he couldn’t live with losing is Remus because they tell each other everything. Well, almost everything. As soon as (y/n) thinks about his secret, the black smoke stops spinning and takes a form that makes (y/n)’s blood run cold. 

(Y/n) can see Remus’ confused gaze and hear the murmurs of his classmates confusion as the black smoke slowly takes form of a mirror image of (y/n), but with one difference. The boggart (y/n) is smiling a twisted smile and his eyes are cold as they lock onto (y/n). (Y/n) stopps hearing the confused chatter of his classmates and watches his boggart twin look at him. 

“Look at you.” Fake (y/n) snears. “So pathetic. You can’t do anything wright can you? You’re so worthless. You should have listened to the voices in your head a long time ago.” The real (y/n) knows he should cast the spell before the boggart can say anything more, but he can’t feel his boy anymore. He’s dully aware of the soft thunk of his wand falling to the floor, but all he can hear is the boggarts taunting words and the roar of his blood in his ears.

“You should have killed yourself when they told you too. Oh, wait. You did, and you couldn’t even do that right.” (Y/n) can feel tears falling down his cheeks as he watches the boggart step closer to him. 

“Now all you do is ruin everything you touch. You ruined your parents lives. That’s why their dead. If you can’t have been born, there wouldn’t have been no reason for them to get sick. It’s all your fault. Then you pushed all your problems onto Remus. He was fine on his own before he got stuck with you. He did everything for you. And how do you repay him?’’ After every sentence, the boggart steps closer to (y/n). As he gets closer, (y/n) starts to step backwards, trying to get away, but it seems like for every step he takes back, the boggart has already taken three closer to him.

(Y/n) is faintly aware of someone screaming his name, but all he can hear clearly is the boggart. The boggart flings off his robs and grabs the hem of it’s shirt and grinning evilly before ripping it off over its head. (Y/n) can see all the scars from his cutting, old and new are bleeding. There s rivers of blood oozing from the boggards stomach. (Y/n) is opening sobbing now as he feels his back hit a wall and he slowly slides down it. 

“P-please! D-don-n’t d-do this! P-p-please!” (Y/n)’s voice is shrill as he screams and pleads for the boggart to stop. But the beginning only seemed to eg the boggart on. And he cackles a laugh, stepping even closer and it leans down. It’s face is right in front of (y/n)’s and (y/n) has nowhere to move to avoid it. The boggart loses it’s smile and stares at (y/n) with a look that’s almost pity.

“Do you want it to stop?” It’s voice is a mix of mocking and seriousness that (y/n) just nodded violently. He’d do anything for this to stop.

“There’s only one thing you can do for it to stop. Kill yourself, and do it right. Use your wand. Use the unforgivable curse. It only works if you mean it, and I’m pretty sure you will mean it.”

(Y/n) is about to say yes, but before he could get the word out, there’s a loud bang. (Y/n) instinctively covers his head and ducks. When he looks back up, the boggart is back to being black smoke and he sees that Remus is the only other one left in the room and he’s holding a muggle gun. The nuzzle still pointing at where the head of the boggart previously was. His face is like stone as he casts a spell and drags that boggart back to the wardrobe, casting it in before slamming the door shut and locking it.

(Y/n) is still sobbing when Remus runs over to him. Remus knees down next to (y/n) and tries to pull him into a embrace, but (y/n) flinches away from Remus, expecting him to hate him now.

“I’m s-s-orry! P-please! Do-don’t hate m-m-me.” (Y/n) whimpers as Remus rests a gentle hand on (y/n)’s hair, stroking it in hopes of calming the young wizard. (Y/n) won’t meet Remus’ eyes and just continues to sob into his hands. Remus can feel tears of his own bubbling to the surface, but holds them back. They don’t need both of them crying on the floor. One it bad enough.

“(Y/n)...” Remus says softly and slowly. He tries to lift (y/n)’s head to look at him, but (y/n) refuses to look him in the eyes, going as far as to close his eyes completely. “Will you please look at me. I promise I’m not mad and I don’t hate you. Okay? I just wanna talk. You know none of what the boggart said was true, correct?” 

(Y/n)’s eyes open at that and they search Remus’ eyes for any signs that he’s lying. He doesn’t kind any.

“B-but i-it’s true. It was my fault. I-if mom and dad hadn’t h-had taken m-me to the p-park that day. They n-never would have g-gotten sick or died.” (Y/n) has stopped crying, but he’s still very shaken up. Remus reaches into his pocket and pulls out some chocolate, breaking it in half, and gave the bigger piece to (y/n). (Y/n) nods in thanks as he takes a bite.

“It is not your fault. It was a very cold winter and lost of people got sick that year. And not all of them went to the park with you. And what that boggart said about you being a burden to me? That’s bullshit.” (Y/n)’s eyes snap up and they widen in surprise. Remus almost never cussed, and when it was was noramly when he was in pain or something. Remus wasn’t smile, despite normally doing so when (y/n) looks that surprised. His face was completely serious.

“You are the best thing to happen to me in a long time. You are like a son to me (y/n). Never forget that. If you hadn’t had been there to need me all these years so far, I wouldn’t be here today. I would have killed myself a very long time ago.” (Y/n)’s eyes widen more and gets ready to say something, but Remus hold up his hand for (y/n) to stay quiet.

“So don’t you think for a second you are worthless or that my life if better off without you because that would be bullshit. Okay? ANd if you ever need to talk about what’s going on,anywhere, anytime. You know you can come to me.” (Y/n) lowers his eyes to the ground between them ashe feels the tears coming back, but Remus grips his chin and makes him look Remus in the eyes.

“And if you  **_ever_ ** kill yourself, I will follow you. Do you understand me son? I don’t care what time it is or where the hell either of us are. And I will do it the same way. And for every new scar you purposely give to yourself for ‘punishment’ or anything like that, I will copy it. I was doing the same thing when I was in your year of school. And this is exactly what Sirius, James, and Peter did for me. They checked me weekly for any new scars. And that is what I will do for you now. Every Friday. When they found a new scar or cut that I had no explanation for, they all made the same mark. That is what made me stop. I hope it will be enough to stop you too.”

By now (y/n) and Remus were both crying. (Y/n) nods and opens his arm, silently asking for a hug. When Remus nodded, he lurched forward and buried his head in Remus’ chest, sobbing.

“Thank you Remus! I love you. Your like the big brother or dad I never got to have!” Remus and (y/n) stayed like that until they had both cried their last tears and (y/n) fell asleep in Remus’ arms. 

Remus smiles fondly as he lifts (y/n) up and carries him across the castle and to the Slytherin painting, where the painting let him in without the password. Remus carried (y/n) up the stairs and into the boy’s room before tucking him in. As he leaves, he leaves a small kiss on (y/n)’s forehead and whispers, “Sweet dreams.”

As Remus makes his way back to his classroom, his hand subconsciously rubs his left arm, remembering the faded scars from his youth that are the last thing that remain from his marauder days.

**Author's Note:**

> plz leave a kudo or comment please tell me if you like it


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